so, as it goes right now, i don't want to kill myself, i still feel like doing it but, my friend Gabbie convinced me not to for now, so, essentially she saved my life, at least for now... but, yeah, i'm lonely and still miss the hell out of my friends that really matter and stuff, i'm hoping to hang out with Corinna soon to, maybe get her to meet my girlfriend Jess, idk, but as it stands now, i suppose things are a little better... i hope i get to see Gabbie really soon too, she one of the best people out there... i swear, idk what i would do without her... oh yeah, that's right, i'd prolly die... yeah, as you readers may have noticed, i don't have the greatest outlook on life, and i don't think it'll change very soon... so, idk what'll happen in the future, although, i suppose no ones knows other than the Fates... i've had practically everything bad that could happen to me, happen to me, so, i don't particularly like life or want to be in it anymore, but as i said, i was convinced by my dear friend Gabbie not to kill myself, at least for now... i just lost my dog that i've had for my whole life yesterday which hurt me pretty bad... i'm not sure what to do anymore in life... i'm really not... but for now, i guess i'm okay, and i'm open for suggestions on art or poems... just let me know